It’s not you it’s me.
I’m only interested in those that literally say
“I’m not available”
&
“I could never be with a woman “
&
“I want someone with loads of money”
&
“My house is nicer so I’m going home”
So apparently
I AM
the picky one
~ Kiddṏ 2021
It may sound crazy, and I wouldn’t say this to just anyone but this intense post (minor) surgical pain is kinda the perfect pain.
Impossible to ignore making it very apparent that I have experienced something. There is an intense pain about the size of a fist in the lowest part of my stomach just above my pubic bone.
There are also some serious hot cramps radiating from that clenched fist upward to my navel and back to my asshole. A know-it-all cramp index finger pointing out the obvious (There’s your navel…there’s your asshole… navel…asshole etc.)
The worst menstrual cramps ever but not as intense as natural childbirth.
This experience is WIDE AWAKE but also drowsy and snuggly. The pain is sharp enough to keep me floating right on the edge of that beautiful sleep sea.
Floating mostly in the DELICIOUS drowsy layer of fog that floats just between the waves and the sky of consciousness.
In and out of reality is bliss.
I am so happy that I am not nauseous and that I am not bleeding much. Thankful that my body is fast at work casting it’s magical healing spell. I think Imma gonna make it. The intense pain is more preferable to me than nausea, vomiting, or heavy bleeding.
So far, I give this endometrial ablation a 5 out of 5 star rating…geez I guess I have been doing Google reviews too much 😛
Not that anyone asked me…
~Kiddṏ
Laying on my bed watching the delicious heavy rain’s got me thinking about how the 1st thing you do when you snuggle up against them is kiss the back of their neck
you just do
if there’s long wavy hair in the way you bury your face into the lightly scented depths until your lips meet their nape
then you apply one firm smooch to the base
then a very gentle light-as-a-breath one a little higher up
as you firmly but fleetingly press your pelvis forward into the ripeness of their warm cheeks
and you tighten then slightly release your arms
Unless you’re snuggling a friend
(Which means that you refrain from pressing your pelvis into their cheeks after the neck kisses of course)
then you just lay there snuggled up and experience the rain together
~KiDDṏ
So many delicious days & nights of perfect snuggle weather.
“And if you can’t be with the one you love honey
snug the one you’re with, snug the one you’re with,
snug the one you’re with, snug the one you’re with.”
I’m happy to have lived through more times wishing that they would never end
than times wishing that they would
~KiDDṏ
Gorgeous January morning in Florida
click HERE for a short video of me accompanied by Norah Jones’ Sunrise
I’m sure that it would make me uncomfortable if anyone ever tried to put me first.
Hell, maybe someone already has and I successfully resisted that pointless horse shit.
The only 1st I can actually enjoy are 1st place ribbons I earn myself.
Whether it be through foot races, spelling bees or science fairs I enjoy becoming 1st through my own efforts.
Other than that I’d much rather put everyone else before me even if they haven’t earned it.
So, would I like someone else to make my wants and desires a priority?
Like the owl with the Tootsie Pop: The world may never know.
~ Kiddo
Warning: Don’t casually touch me. My flesh is thirsty
~KiDDṏ
You know when you squirt the dish soap into the sink and seconds later you notice a PLETHORA of tiny magical bubbles floating all around you and you instantly feel like the hills are alive with the sound of music? (I guess to younger folks you’d feel like a Disney Princess). Well that happened to me this evening and nothing else that happened today matters. Excuse me while I sing with the woodland creatures that have inhabited my kitchen.
~KiDDṏ
Falling in love instantly at the impersonal touch.
Keeping my face matter of fact
Listening I nod as you move me this way & that
on the inside I am purring & arching my back.
Whether being checked for bunions at fifty or headlice at seven
the hands upon me feel as if they are giving rather than taking.
Like heaven.
Instantly and forever but just a little
In love
~Kiddo
When I am experiencing anxiety: My mind knows nothing is going to happen but can’t stop thinking “But what if it does?!”
When I am experiencing an unrequited crush: My mind knows nothing is going to happen but can’t stop thinking “But what if it does?!”
~KiDDṏ
I woke before 4a.m. and tried to sink back into sweet sweet sleep but I felt lonely and untouched so eventually I gave up. Feeling a tidal pull I went outside to commune with the brilliant waxing Beaver moon.
Luna felt my longing and let me know that she empathized easily with my situation because she too is old and alone and untouched by human flesh even though she waxes every month.
“Aha, so the conspiracy theorist are correct!” I thought but she replied “No, I have had visitors in the past but those space suits do not allow for physical intimacy.”
I felt that
I was feeling better about my own situations and thanked her as usual for her lunar inspirations and I lifted my face another moment to bathe in her light.
As I turned to prepare for my day I felt her say “Don’t worry my darling this is but a phase.”
I smiled at her phase turn of phrase. If anyone should know about that it is she.
~ Kiddo 11/11/2019
~KiDDṏ
Notwithstanding the potential hurricane, it feels ABSOLUTELY luxurious to not have to go to a job for the next 2 days. I have had 2 days off since January and they were NOT in succession. I get 2 in a row !!(maybe more if things go south but I get 2 off for sure before the potential shit hits the potential fan) I got a few new books and I am excited to read them 😁
~KiDDṏ
I don’t want what I need,
I just need what I want.
Sometimes the line between
desire and require becomes blurred.
Sometimes my thoughts become slurred.
We all know the difference,
even as we fool ourselves.
There is just no excitement
in luxuriating in our necessities.
~ Kiddo 2012
~ Kiddo
seeking solace in the horizon of life and beyond
Updates on current Projects at the Siena Art Institute in Siena, Italy. For more info visit our website www.sienaart.org
Poetry and words
Doing What Makes My Soul Shine
writing is sorrow; having had written is sublime
in search of a better us
Fighting Depression, Anxiety, and Self-Harm
Subtitles: Kiddo's Korner, Spinach in Your Mamma's Smile, Mutterings of a Mad Woman, Don't Mention It, Never Argue with an Idiot , Lord Beer Me Strength, Random Thoughts, You Don't Have To Thank Me (It's What I Do) and UNNECESSARY CAPITALIZATION.
MY TAKE ON LIFE.
Mind • Body • Life
A collection of nonsensical words thrown together
adventures of sadie and momma
A "How to Thrive" Guide After Divorce
A Hopefully Formerly Depressed Human Vows To Practice Self-Approval
Not That Anyone Asked Me... 